"Oh-ten"

I remember the day I first calculated the year I would graduate. It was in 7th grade. I was talking with my best friend Sarah. We were counting on our fingers, trying to figure out what year we would be seniors. After a couple tries, (cuz we were never good at math, even when we helped each other) Sarah smiled as she said, "We'll be the graduates of 'oh-ten'!"

That was five years ago. I thought five years was such a long way a ways. But "oh-ten" is here now. "Oh-ten" is the spring I graduate. "Oh-ten" is the summer I get to spend with my friends, family, and Carl. "Oh-ten" is the autumn I move to Kansas City. It's the year I perform in my last high school play and I have no idea when I will be back on the stage I love so dearly. It's the year I turn 18 and I'll never be able to relive the good, and bad high school moments. It's the year that I start a whole new chapter in my life...again. 

I am going to make the best of this year. Especially the first three-quarters, before I go off to college. I'm going to try my hardest in school. I am going to act my best in theater. I am going to make the best of this summer; doing something fun everyday. Whether it be helping at VBS, having Sarah down to visit, going to Minnesota for the CGYC mission trips, spending time with Carl. I am going to build even deeper friendships within my youth group. 

My new years resolution is to have no regrets. The only regret I have from this year is taking so long to adjust to my new surroundings. When 2011 comes around, I want to be able to look back and say that 2010 was the best year of my life. I am excited, nervous, and happy all at once. So 2010, here I come! :)

God bless the graduates of "oh-ten"!

Performance

So, this morning, I was taking advantage of my three day snow day (ridiculous! one day was great, two days were good, a bit of cabin fever though, but three days? Come on now. That's just called "not wanting to go to work tomorrow") and I slept in until about 9:30. I always sleep with the radio on. I don't know why, but I just do. Anyway, I was listening to 100.7 KGBI, a Christian radio station and there happened to be a talk-show going on when I woke up. A lady was telling a story....

There was a woman who had a son, about 3 or 4 years old, and he had a severe mental disorder. One morning, this lady was washing the dishes up after breakfast. Her son was sitting there, drooling, with food all over his face. As she washed the dishes, she was praying and God asked her something. 
"Do you love your son?"
"Why, yes, of course I do."
"Why do you love him? He can't "perform" for you. He won't be able to walk at his graduation, he won't be able to get married, won't be able to give you grandchildren. WHY do you love him?"
"Well, I love him because he is mine."
"And that, daughter, is how I feel about you."

You see, we will never be able to "perform" for God. Nothing we do is ever "good enough" for God. "Performing" isn't how we "win" God over. God loves us because we are His ! The Bible says that every "righteous" thing we do, is just a dirty rag in God's eyes. (Isaiah 64:6) No "good work" will make Him love us any more than He already does. And you guys, I can't even begin to describe His love for us. We can't even imagine it! It makes me shiver!! (well, that and the fact that my room is an icebox :-p )
I guess that story just kind of hit me and I've been thinking about it all day so I wanted to share it. And I'm not saying that our "good works" don't mean anything, cuz they do! But, I feel like so many people out there think they aren't "good enough" or they are required to do a certain amount of good things in their lives, when in reality, that is not the case! We just need to believe in Jesus Christ, love Him, and allow ourselves to be loved. Which, sometimes, is easier said than done.