God Is...

“God is…” So many different people have so many different ways of finishing that sentence. Who is God? Do we really know? We can defiantly scratch the surface; that is what my life has become about. But the thing is, God is infinite. We will never be able to fully comprehend the fullness of any one attribute of God. But that’s the mystery, and adventure of it all! We never know what He is going to reveal to us.
A lot of people, myself included, have wrong views of God, whether we know it or not. For example, for most of my life, I always thought, subconsciously, that God was angry with me. But He’s not. He delights in me, even in my weaknesses. From what I’ve seen, many people view God as a distant, angry, judgmental person who regrets creating humans. But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.
Last year, I went on a mission to read the whole Bible; just 'cause. When I started, I took my blue pen, and began to underline an attribute of God each time I saw it. Let’s take a look at who the Bible says God is… 

God is everlasting. God is I AM. God is a jealous God. God is compassionate. God is gracious. God is slow to anger. God is abounding in loving-kindness and truth. God is with us. God is a consuming fire. God is in heaven. God is our God. God is in the midst of us. God is great. God is awesome. God is the God of gods. God is our praise. God is with you wherever you go. God is with you. God is peace. God is our judge. God is our rock. God is sovereign. God is our fortress. God is our deliverer. God is our refuge. God is our shield. God is my salvation. God is our stronghold. God is worthy to be praised. God is the God of Israel. God is enthroned above the cherubim. God is alone God over all the kingdoms of the earth. God is good. God is just. God is glorious. God is mighty. God is wise. God is powerful. God is more glorious than the moon. God shines brighter than the stars. God is mighty in power and understanding. God is all-powerful. God is greater than we can understand. God is clothed in dazzling splendor. God is righteous. God is the One who lifts our head. God is a righteous judge. God is a stronghold for the oppressed. God is King forever and ever. God is with the righteous generation. God is the portion of our inheritance. God is at our right hand, we cannot be shaken. God is our strength. God is holy. God is our shepherd. God is upright. God is a friend. God is our light. God is the defense of our life. God is a saving defense. God is near to the broken hearted. God is a very present help in trouble. God is a great King over all the earth.  God is highly exalted. God is the mighty One. God is the sustainer of our souls. God is for me. God is the trust of all the ends of the earth and of the farthest sea. God is a father to the fatherless. God is a defender for the widows. God is our hope. God is our confidence. God is the strength of our hearts. God is our portion forever. God is the God who works wonders. God is our redeemer. God is the living God. God is a sun and a shield. God is great in Zion. God has compassion on His children. God is mindful of us. God is clothed with splendor and majesty. God is good forever. God is high above all the nations. God is merciful. God is good to all. God is near to those who call upon him. God is my song. God is a refuge from the storm. God is shade from the heat. God is a God of justice. God is our lawgiver. God is creator of the ends of the earth. God is our peace. God is love.   

You may be saying "Actions speak louder than words Katie! Did you skip over the Old Testament? Did you forget about the book of Revelation?!" Oh of course I didn't! The book of Revelation happens to be my favorite book, other than the Song of Solomon. But do you actually know what the book of Revelation is? It's the revelation of Jesus Christ, who He is as the Son of God. That's the primary purpose of the book, not to scare us about the future.
God is love. He loves us. He is a jealous God, so He will do anything to bring us back to Him EXCEPT violate our free will. He doesn't want robots, He wants a person to love Him freely. "Jealousy is a husband's fury" - Proverbs 6:34
Ladies, let's say you are married. If someone were to attack you, you'd better believe your husband would fight back, wouldn't he? (If not, you have a bigger problem on your hands). But lets say, that for some reason, you left him for someone else. Would he fight for you to come back? Try and win your heart again? I would hope so. But if he cared about you enough, he would want you to be happy, right? He would try his hardest, but he would never force you to come back to him against your own will. That's what I'm trying to say about God. He is forever chasing us, but never catching us, unless we let Him. I call the judgments in the book of Revelation "speed bumps to hell". All God is doing is removing all that hinders love, so that He may dwell with those who have chosen to fully follow after Him. Everyone else has decided they would rather live apart from Him, and so He gives them what they want. And honestly, what you see in that book is the LEAST He could do. He is holding Himself back, He really is.

As for the Old Testament, it is very similar. I don't know about you, but I would hate to be defined by my actions. I'm not a mean person, but if I had children, I might discipline them in ways that might seem mean to them, or even to the people around me. But if I knew that the choices they were making were not good choices, and I let them go unpunished, I would not be a very good, responsible mom, now would I? I would punish them in hopes that they would learn from their mistakes, and make better choices the next time. God is not His actions. He is not mean, unloving, judgemental, or distant. He is a kind, loving, understanding, near Father who accepts us in our weakness. If we write someone off, just because we didn't like how they dealt with their child, or the way they handled a situation, we could miss out on getting to know someone really great.
I want to get to know God. To me, He seems like a really great guy. 

The Global Cry for Justice: God's Lack of Provision...or the Greed of Mankind?

My first day at IHOPU = Success. Enlightening, inspiring, but also sobering. I'm going to list some statistics and I don't want you to just browse over or skip them, I want you to read them and really have them sink in. 

Hunger

~ 1.02 Billion people do not have enough to eat - that's more than USA, Canada and Europe combined. 

~ 925 Million in developing countries alone are hungry.

For $35 million a day, we could feed every hungry person

Everyday:

$225 billion is spent to feed into obisity in America.

$105 million worth of food is thrown out.

$98 million is spent on weight loss products.

$42 million is spent on pet food.

For $35 million a day, we could feed every hungry person

Only $5 million a day is spent on aid for the hungry. 

War

World military expenditure in 2007 is estimated to have reached $1.3 Trillion in current dollars...the USA contributed to half of that amount. 

For $35 million a day, we could feed every hungry person

Death

Worldwide abortion statistics 1920-2008:

~ 961 million total abortions...by now, in 2011, at over 3 million abortions per month globally, that's close to 1 billion abortions in the last 91 years.

~ 1 in 5 pregnancies end in abortion.

Right now the most dangerous place is not the battlefield, but in your own mother's womb. 

Changing the laws will not end abortion...almost half  are done illegally. The issue isn't the laws, it's the heart of mankind...which is why prayer is crucial  in this day and age.  

Slavery/Sex Industry (Human Trafficking)

~ 27 million slaves worldwide...slavery is also illegal worldwide....laws are not the issue here, it's the heart of mankind

~ Child trafficking is the fastest growing crime in the world

~ Every minute 2 children are forced into prostitution.

~ $90 is the average cost of a slave...

Think of how much dinner and a movie would cost you and some of your friends...

~ Human trafficking is a $7 billion per year industry

~ Pornography is a $57 billion per year industry

For $35 million a day, we could feed every hungry person

People ask "If God is a god of Love, then why is He not providing to those in the 3rd world countries?"

That's not the question we should be asking. The question we should be asking is, "Is this issue in our world because of lack of provision, or because of mankind's greed?" 

In Luke 18, Jesus talks about the widow who kept going to an unjust judge, asking for justice in a certain area in her life. This wicked judge refused until he could no longer stand her constently begging him, and making him look bad. So if an unjust, wicked judge will do good for the oppressed, how much more will a Just, loving God do for His people? Especially His people who cry out for justice to be done on the earth. 

And will not God bring about justice for His chosen ones, who cry out to Him day and night? Will He keep putting them off? I tell you, He will see that they get justice, and quickly. (Luke 18:7-8) 

The Sound of Silence

Abortion.

Why? 

Some people know this, some people don't. I was just days away from not being born...alive. My biological grandfather had scheduled for his daughter, my birth-mother Alisha, to have an abortion. Alisha had no desire to go through with it, but she was only 16. Finally, he gave Alisha the choice. Abortion, or adoption. She was estatic that she didn't have to kill me. She knew I deserved a good family, but even more, that I had the right to life. So, as you can probably guess by now, I was born...alive, and adopted into the Kotila family. 

Obama quoted this, "I am going to teach them (his daughters) first of all about values and morals. But if they make a mistake, I don’t want them punished with a baby."

Punishment?! This infuriates me. An baby, born or unborn, is the ultimate blessing, no matter the circumstances of conception. I am no punishment. And the same goes for every other unborn baby in the past, present and future. I am a person. I am a strong, unique, special, beautiful young woman. I have desires, feelings, hopes, dreams, likes, dislikes, hobbies, talents, unique physical features...just like every other human being. But I didn't recieve all these things after birth. It's who I am. It's who I was created to be. All these things were ingrained in me at conception. Like the well known Dr. Suess story Horton Hears a Who quotes, "A person's a person, no matter how small".

DNA. DNA is an amazing thing. But it is only ever created once. Our country has killed off over 50 million unique DNA codes, that will never again be duplicated. That child that was murdered, will never again have the chance to live. Every child deserves the same chance at life that I was given. This is a poem I wrote about 2 years ago, showing my heart for this issue:

Dear Birth-mother,

Thank you for giving me life,

I am ever so grateful.

You’ve never had a chance to be a wife

But you let me be your daughter.

When I think about every baby

Who has been murdered today,

It makes me very angry,

That abortion is legal in the USA.

Then I remember your choice,

Long before I was born,

To give me a life and to give me a voice.

I will not take these gifts for granted.

We have never met, 

Because we are so far apart.

But you are really great I bet.

You have to be, for letting me live.

Why do people choose abortion?

They were a fetus once too.

There is always the choice of adoption.

Why choose death, when you can give life?

Oh if only every baby had a chance like me.

To have friends and a family,

To have fun and be carefree.

Then America truly would be the best country.

Someday I hope to be, 

a wife, a mother, a friend.

I want to adopt a baby,

who was given the same gift that you gave me.

So once again I thank you,

For giving me hope, a future

And dreams I long to pursue.

I promise I will not let you down.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart

Always, 

Your Daughter

Because of my history, my past, I have been given a story and a voice. My voice is for the unborn, for the ones who have been silenced. The other day, my friend Arielle and I were talking and she brought up the idea of me writting to the Senator of Nebraska on the issue of abortion. I kept thinking about it and I was really doubtful, not really knowing how to do it, or what to say etc. So I asked God to confirm it again if it was something He wanted me to do. Today I was on my mom's laptop and an e-mail notification popped up on the screen. The subject of this e-mail?

"Tell your Senator to stand for LIFE". 

What?! Ok God....

I will not silence myself on this issue when I have been so blessed to recieve my voice. I will not put myself into compromise by voting for those who are pro-choice. I will not shield my eyes from this bloodshed in my country. I will not allow myself to fall asleep to the sound of silence. 

I Became Me

I took a road down memory lane tonight, reading through my blog, and I came across something I wrote not too long ago. On May 26th 2010 I wrote a post called Becoming Me.
It almost brought tears to my eyes because I've seen how much I really have changed, matured. I talked about how I was moving away, no longer fully dependent on my parents. I have one month left in Fire in the Night and all I have been able to think about lately is how excited I am to go home. Why? I'm not exactly sure. I do have a fear of going home, not having faith in myself that I can keep up this walk with Jesus that I have found so intimately here. But I am excited to go home because I am worn out. I am completely and utterly worn out. I'm tired of taking care of myself, of living with 4 other girls, of doing things on my own. I am ready to go home and relax. Be in my own bed, see my friends, have fun and not have a care in the world.
But here, I really truly did become me. I walked into the next phase of God's life for me and I am overwhelmed at all He has done for me these last 5 months. I feel a lot more mature than I did before. But what makes me laugh is that I say that about every 6 months. But that's what life is. Maturing, growing, learning, laughing, crying, sighing, running, falling...becoming you.

You Are Worth Everything

What is value? Worth?

According to the dictionary, the word value means "a fair return or equivalent in goods, services, or money for something exchanged."

One thing that has been highlighted to me while being home, is how women today see themselves as so low in value, or worthless. You see it everywhere. Magazines, movies, conversations.....

Why is this?

Us women have such a desire to love, be loved (as do men...but that is a totally different subject), be beautiful, feel accepted etc etc.

But we are so hard on ourselves. We need the "sexy body". We need the latest style clothes. We need the boyfriend. But why?

Why do we rate our self-worth in what the world says? 

Our worth shouldn't be baised on what people say about us.

Beauty. What is beauty? The media tells us beauty is a size 2 with the latest Gucci purse and Dolce and Gabona shoes.

But God is beauty. If you study what the scriptures say about His beauty and the beauty of His throne room in Heaven, I promise you, you will be blown away.

God made us in His image, so how dare we say that we are anything less than beautiful.

But I know what that's like. I used to be a captive to self-hatred. I would look at myself in the mirror everyday and utterly despise what I saw. But not anymore. I might not be the "beautiful" everyone else strives to be, but I am radiating with true beauty, both inside and out, because that is how God sees me.

Beauty isn't a size, a number on a scale...beauty is you. Because that is who God created you to be.

Song of Solomon 4:7

You are altogether lovely, my darling. There is no blemish on you.

"If you got it, flaunt it"

I hate that.

Have you ever noticed that you never see commercials on TV for the expensive cars, like BMWs, Corvetts, Mustangs, etc.? You see commercials for the cheap cars.

I am an expensive BMW, worth being sought out by a man. I am not a cheap car, ready to advertise myself to the world.

I am worth so much more than throwing myself at men. I am a jewel, worth being worked hard for. And I'm not saying this in a "I'm better than you" sort of way.

I'm saying this because God said I was worth the blood of His Son, Christ; and the Bible says a husband should love his wife as Christ loves the church.

Today girls give themselves to such low standards. They settle into compromise. I know, I did it for a year and a half. It tore me apart. I thought I was feeling better about myself, but really it was just feeding my self-hatred.

Why do we value ourselves so low? Because we don't think we are worth anything. Why is that? I honestly don't know. I don't have words to describe how valuable we are to God. And the fact that people don't see that...it breaks my heart, it really does.

I don't agree with the dictonary's description of value. We don't need to give God anything in return for His value. He sees us as worth it, just because He loves us. I know I am valuable because the Creator created me with His own two hands. That, to me, speaks in volumes.

Our worth, should come from how God sees us.

Guess what?

He says we are worth everything.

Once Upon a Time

....Snow White fell for the first man who climbed over her wall

....Ariel fell for the first man who drowned in her ocean

....Jasmine fell for the first street rat that lied to her about who he was

....Aurora fell for the first man she saw when she woke up

....Pocahontas fell for the first handsome guy who explored her land

....Cinderella fell for the first man she danced with

It seems to me that the only two sensible princess Disney has given us are Belle and Tiana. And what do these fabulous animated women have in common? Their princes.

Their princes had to become either an ugly beast or a slimy frog before they could win their princess' hearts. 

I think that this could apply to a lot of girls today. I know that for me, I don't just want a knight in shining armor. I want a guy who would do anything, including becoming an "ugly beast" or a "slimy frog" to show to me that he is worthy of my love. 

I'm not saying that I'm the most important thing ever, but I do know that I deserve to be treated, and loved like a princess; because all girls are princesses! We are the daughters of Christ, who is the King of Kings.

And men, do you want to be that flimsy guy that can sweep any girl off her feet just with your looks or charm? Or you do want to be the actual hero who can be strong for your woman? You have to make that choice yourself.

I'm not gonna settle for the handsome charming prince. I want the one who isn't perfect. The one that is strong enough to carry us through hard times. I want the beast.

My Eschatology

My passion for learning about the End Times began back when I was home-schooled and I spent almost 50% of my time reading. My mom had read the series Left Behind  by Jerry B. Jenkins and Tim LaHaye. After a while, they started coming out with books called Left Behind: The Kids. I remember I started reading them, oh, when I was probably about 9 or 10. The characters in the books were ages 12,13,15, and 16 when the series began so it was fairly easy to relate with them.

Now, I am using this blog to write about and share what I believe about the End Times and the book of Revelation (and other books dealing with the prophecy of Jesus' second coming) but what I say here, is just my opinion. It is a mixture of what I believe the Bible is saying,  and what I have heard other people teach on (which, by the way, I always take back to the Bible to make sure it matches up with the Word of God). So, if you disagree with some, or all, or none of what I am saying, it's not gonna hurt my feelings. Go ahead and believe whatever...this is just my opinion. But beware, I am not good with confrontation (because at the same time, I can also be very stubborn), so if you start arguing with me, please be nice... :-p

Ok. There is so much to say, I don't really know where to start...but I will start with a rough timeline...I will elaborate each point more later on...

1. The "birth pangs" or "sorrows"

2. Antichrist signs a seven year peace treaty with Isreal, and the nations. 

3. 3 1/2 years of peace between nations. 

4. The abomination of desolation

5. 3 1/2 years of war 

6. Jesus physically returns to the earth to start His 1,000 year reign on the earth. 

7. New Jerusalem and New Earth combine to make what we will live in for eternity.

Before I go any further, I want to state another personal conviction of mine. In the Left Behind books, the Christians disappear into thin air, leaving behind their clothes, and even things like contacts or teeth fillings. They called this "the disappearings". Today, this theory is called the "Dispensationalism" or a "secret rapture" where God take His believers in a split second. I personally do not believe this theory is biblical. But, I do believe we will be "Raptured". 1 Corinthians 15:50-52 says "Now this I say, brethren, that (1)flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God; nor does corruption inherit incorruption. Behold, I tell you a mystery: We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed - In a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at (2)the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound and(3)the dead will be raised incorruptible, and we shall be changed. 

(1) If flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, then were did all the bodies go when they disappeared in that "secret rapture"?

(2) What is the last trumpet? During the Great Tribulations, God will release judgments on the Antichrist, and his followers. These judgments are known as the 7 bowls,  7 seals and  7 trumpets.  Revelation 11:15 says "Then the seventh angel (or trumpet) sounded: And there were loud voices in heaven, saying, 'The kingdoms of this world have become the kingdoms of our Lord and His Christ and He shall reign forever and ever."

So basically, this 7th trumpet starts Jesus' descent onto earth and the end of the 7 year Tribulation. 

1 Thessalonians 4:16-17 then says "For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of an archangel, and with the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first (meaning, those who are physically dead and buried). Then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up (or raptured) in the clouds to meet Him in the air, and thus we shall always be with the Lord."

(3) But wait! (1) said that flesh and blood cannot inherit the Kingdom of God... and yet 1 Thessalonians is saying that the "alive Christians" will be "caught up in the clouds". Won't we still be flesh and blood then? Aren't these two verses contradicting themselves? 

No, they are not. Because firstly, (3) states "...and we shall be changed." Now, I'm not exactly sure what that means, but it very well could mean that our physical bodies will somehow change into our spiritual beings. But, that's just my thought. I have no idea if it's right. But also, when we are "caught up in the clouds" we will be with Jesus. Jesus is flesh and blood. He was living on earth around flesh and blood and corruption for 33 years before He died on the cross. So being "caught up in the clouds" is different than "inheriting the kingdom of God". 

Does that make sense?   

So, these verses are the reason why I do not believe that the "dispensationalism" is biblical.

Now back to the timeline.

1. The "birth pangs" or "sorrows"

Matthew 24: 4-8

And Jesus answered and said to them: “Take heed that no one deceives you. For many will come in My name, saying, ‘I am the Christ,’ and will deceive many. And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not troubled; for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. And there will be famines, pestilences, and earthquakes in various places. All these are the beginning of sorrows.(The Greek word for birth pangs is translated into sorrow in this NKJV translation)

Why "birth pangs"? Because it is the beginning of  birthing a new order for the earth. A new order in which Jesus comes to reign on the earth. What happens when a woman is in labor? When the contractions start, the get worse and worse until eventually the baby comes.

Ok then...what are the birth pangs? When will we know they are happening? 

The scripture above lists, wars and ethnic conflict ("nation against nation, kingdom against kingdom"), famines, pestilences, and earthquakes. 

Luke 21:7-11 says

So they asked Him, saying, “Teacher, but when will these things be? And what sign will there be when these things are about to take place?”  And He said: “Take heed that you not be deceived. For many will come in My name, saying, ‘I am He,’ and, ‘The time has drawn near.’ Therefore do not go after them. But when you hear of wars and commotions, do not be terrified; for these things must come to pass first, but the endwill not come immediately.” Then He said to them, “Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. And there will be great earthquakes in various places, and famines and pestilences; and there will be fearful sights and great signs from heaven. 

I personally, believe that we are in the first stages of the birth pangs now. I believe that these birth pangs started either in 1948 when Isreal became a nation again, or in 1967 when Jerusalem came under Jewish rule. This article (by Mike Bickle,  International House of Prayer) explains why better than I can:

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The New Testament has apostles functioning with prophetic revelation. When you study the prophets in

Scripture, what God does in Israel is the reference point or litmus test for the end times. As Gentiles—most of

us in this room are Gentiles—God causes the timing of His redemptive plan to be related to the city and nation

that He is coming back to and from which He will rule the nations. The city and nation that Jesus is coming

back to where He is going to rule the world from is Jerusalem. It is the reference point on the timing of His

return. All the timing in the Scripture related prophetic events to the city of Jerusalem and the nation of Israel.

The most dramatic thing in history happened in Israel. After 2,000 years, Israel became a nation. This is

unprecedented in world history. It stands in a category of its own—way out there, all by itself.

It said in the Old Testament in many places directly or by implication, Israel had to be a nation in the generation

in which the Messiah returns. We are going to look at some of these passages, so you can become more aware

of them. The prophets of the Old Testament 2,500 to 3,000 years ago prophesied that Israel would become a

nation, and they will occupy the city of Jerusalem before the Messiah returns.

That was all fine and easy back in the Old Testament when Israel was in the land and controlled the city of

Jerusalem, so those seemed like pretty normal prophecies. Then, the Roman armies came in 70AD. They

scattered the Jewish nation to the four winds, took over the city of Jerusalem, and disbanded the nation. All of a

sudden, many of the Old Testament prophets were asking, “How is Israel going to become a nation again? How

will Israel be reinstated in their statehood—their nationhood?” That was OK for maybe fifty years, or maybe

even a hundred years. But then, the people of God began to say, “Huh? This is getting a little more difficult to

happen. For 6,000 years since Adam, no nation in the history of the world has ever been without a homeland for

one generation, and then they recovered the land.”

Two thousand years later, it looks impossible. There is not by chance. It has never been done. Even after forty

years, it had never been done. Suddenly in May 1948, Israel becomes a nation and the prophetic time clock

starts up again. For those who are unfamiliar with Bible prophecy, this might seem like a small thing; but it is a

gigantic shout from heaven that the end-time clock began on May 14, 1948.

Yeah, it hurts your brain doesn't it? Here's one more reason why I think we are in the birth pangs now. And this, is just something I have thought up in my head...not really anything I've heard. All those verses list famines and earthquakes etc. as signs of the times. But what about just plain disobedince to God? I mean think about it. Can you list somethings that our society is accepting now that they weren't accepting 50, 60 years ago? I can.

Abortion.

Homosexuality.

Witchcraft.

Pornography.

Maybe I'm wrong...but were there as many Pride parades 50 years ago as there are now? Do you think that Harry Potter would have been an acceptable book to read?

Luke 12:2-3 says

For there is nothing covered that will not be revealed, nor hidden that will not be known. Therefore whatever you have spoken in the dark will be heard in the light, and what you have spoken in the ear in inner rooms will be proclaimed on the housetops.

I don't know if that pertains to my theory, but to me it fits. I feel like it's saying, those sins that you hid before, will no longer be hidden, but will be proclaimed with loud, and proud voices.

Ok, I'm gonna have to finish this up some other time and finish the remaining 6 points of the timeline...for those who are interested. But I will say one last thing.

I truely believe that Jesus is coming back soon. If not my generation, then my kids. I have a desire to be there and see Jesus come back after the 7 years with the Antichrist. Yeah, it's scary to think that 20, 30 years from now, life as we know it could be over. But you know what? I'm either gonna die and be with Jesus in Heaven, or be with Him at the end of this world. So really, the end result is the same; it's just the getting there that's different. And in Heaven, our past pains and hardships won't matter anymore...so what's the difference?

:)

P.S. Eschatology is the study of the end times.